homesickness and trembling
I do everything for the stars. For the sky. For all things beautiful. And everything is beautiful.
Sometimes I find myself trembling with ecstasy just thinking about the Beauty in the world… and Everything is Beautiful, because Everything is connected.
There is a home that I might never come to see, but I think about it all the time, even though I’ve no memories of it. There’s a place and time that I mourn for, a place and time that I might have experienced or have yet to experience.
It’s not enough that I what I see is “beautiful”. I can’t tell. I can’t tell if something is beautiful just by looking at it. It’s only beautiful if I can feel that it is beautiful. As long as I feel it, I know, and there’s no more disputing its beauty after that.
It drives me insane, this whole business of feeling the world… even if it’s just feeling a tiny bit of it. A way of feeling that brings together every shred of living being in me, creating an intense awareness of my existence – mind body spirit and all. I can’t imagine feeling the entire universe – god must be insane.
